In an effort to dispel the Baa Humbug we have received the following.
To the melody "Jingle Bells"
Oh my God! Oh my God! I'm struggling with permanent way.
Fishplates are the culprit, though I'm having a bad Peco day.
Oh my God! Oh my God! My fingers are covered in goo.
Everything's wrong, even this song, and the fishplates are all askew.
Bought a packet of fifty, was happy with my bargain
Googled how to do it, but got confused by all the jargon!
Why don't they fit quick and easy, just like the video shows?
Don't they know my IQ's low, and my blood press-ure just rose?
Oh my God! Oh my God! The quality is horrendous!
Now there's blood and gore, slowing down the chore,
this won't be done by Christmas!
Oh my God! Oh my God! These bad boys are so small,
Can't get the gist, think I broke my wrist, Happy Christmas to one and all!
Contributed by long distance associate in Sweden Malcolm!